August 05, 2014 by
“Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.” ― Paul Terry
Are you one of them? Do you roll on the bed on weekends trying to measure the length and breadth of the bed? Are you sitting with food in your mouth till it forms a little mountain inside your cheek?
If you can relate to any of these symptoms, then you have the ‘laziness syndrome’- a very serious condition that makes you sit all day like a couch potato (especially on weekends), and no amount of pressure or screaming can move you from this state!
Nodding your head to everything I just said? So let’s check out how lazy are you?
1. You dropped food on the floor, but you couldn’t be bothered to pick it up. After all your favorite show is on TV and a little food on the floor wouldn’t hurt anyone. Would it? Nah! So you just sit there waiting for someone to clean it up.
2. Did you take a bath? When someone asks you that you give all kinds of reasons for not showering. Saving water, too much bath is not good for your skin, saving the earth, and what not! So you stay in the same pyjamas all weekend staying away from the washroom as much as possible.
3. There’s a pile of dishes in your sink! Eeeks! But you couldn’t care less. Dishes are meant to be in the sink and someone will eventually clean them up. So why bother? And if you don’t have time for a bath let the dishes at least have one!
4. You just love buying the inner wear. Well not because you love them so much, but because you couldn’t waste your time washing them. Yes! If fresh is what it’s meant to be why not buy some!
5. Hunger strikes but you just can’t let go of the bed. So you shout your lungs out to whoever is listening and tell them what you want to eat. Or you just call up the pizza guy who apparently is your very good friend because you couldn’t be bothered to cook, drops by with your favorite pizza! Exactly the way you want it!
6. It’s Friday night! Your friends are planning to party and get sloshed. But you just bump them off saying you have too much to work on. Yes! you just can’t think of leaving your bed and the sheer joy of lazing on it on a Friday night till Sunday! You are just waiting to reach home and plonk on it!
7. You hear screaming from the hall. Your friends are watching the scariest horror movie of all time, but no amount of screaming can startle you. You are too preoccupied in your laziness to give the ghost so much as a stare.
8. The TV has been playing the same ads over and over again but you can’t lift your finger to take the remote that’s on a table near you, because it’s too much of a distance to cover. Instead you watch what’s on TV till there’s nothing playing.
9. You want to attend to nature’s call in the middle of the night but your laziness has hit you so badly that you just postpone it till morning. Hoping that your bladder would understand!
10. Someone is knocking on the door but you pretend as if you didn’t hear it. You wait for someone to get the door and revel in all your laziness and curl back right in. Besides, it could be anyone so why bother when someone else can get the door. It would be a good walk for them you think!
If you can relate to more than three on this list, kudos! Your laziness is off the charts and skyrocketing into the kingdom of ‘Laziness’. You deserve an outstanding award for ‘outstanding laziness’.
Psssttt! You know there’s one more thing you could add to your laziness chart? Order food online on JustEat.in. All you need to do is lift a finger and your food comes right to you!